Saturday, January 22, 2011
Whoring it up in the AL East.
Johnny mulling over which AL East team he wants to go to next....
ESPN - Damon agreed to a one-year deal worth $5.25 million plus incentives and Ramirez one year at $2 million, according to SI.com. Both deals are pending physicals. Damon will likely play left field and Ramirez designated hitter.
How 'bout these Tampa Bay Rays, huh? Then win the AL East in 2010 and then EVERYONE bolts. And not just for other teams. Teams IN DIVISION. Just a big "Fuck You!" Crawford a Sock(?). Rafael Soraino a Yankee. Bullpen depleted. Garza to the Cubs. Pena to the Cubs. Bartlett to Whales Vagina. WHO is going to be on the field come Opening Day besides David Price and Eva Longoria and his cock sexting?
Well, pending physicals (which are NOT a lock for these two guys. Manny with his pregnanacy drugs and his endless quest to conceive, Johnny with his...bitch arm) the answer is Johnny Damon and Manny Ramirez. Actually, ManRam will be sitting the bench and anchoring the DH spot. I concede that both of these players still have the ability to be productive offensively. It was not too long ago when Manny was lighting it up in LA and the Dodgers were the hottest ticket in town. He just has to WANT to play. And Johnny's last year in NYY was prodcutive (24 HR 82 RBI 100 RS and a World Championship). He had 17 HR at home that season and is familiar with all divisional opponents and their ball parks. That familiarity will compensate for his short arm throws and lack of speed. Fenway, Baltimore, and Tampa aren't exactly cavernous outfields, like Detroit was. So I see where the Rays heads are at.
It's also going to turn out to be the biggest thing the Rays have ever done. Member Mannywood? And those dred wigs they handed out? Dodger fans are kinda fair weather fans to begin with and they ate that shit up but imagine all the little kiddies from Disney World coming to see Manny and his silly Jamaican haircut even though he's Dominican. The fuck is that? Tampa is like a minor league baseball team. They couldn't even sell out their World Series games back in 2008. They need gimmicks like t-shirt cannons, Red Panda halftime shows, and Zooperstars (Google it) to get the asses in the seats. Well, Manny's the answer. Instead of MannyWood they are going to have "The Human Chorionic GonadoTROPin Den at the TROP". Or the "TestosterZone" out near the StingRay tank in Center. Oh, I like that.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment