Been absent for a few days. Sorry bout that. I can tell all of my loyal readers/commenters are gettin anxious. But I had good reason. I was living it up in Southern California, drinking (free) beer, and betting football. Living the dream, if you will. 15 days of it. I had to leave eventually because Giada took out a restraining order and yesterday was my court-ordered release from the state. Got on the plane at LAX and it was 81 degrees. Got off the plane in Hartford and it was 8. Not only that but it was midnight. And I was in a different time zone. Body's ALL TYPES of fucked up right now. As I met with friends and family while I was out there, it became increasingly clear to me that I will be living in Los Angeles within the next 2 years. And so will you. Here's why:
1. Weather. No shit. See that picture above? That was the view out my window for the last two weeks. And on the other side of the house? Fucking Pacific Ocean. Google Image search Pacific Palisades and that's pretty much what I was dealing with all week. Sure the state is in a financial mess. Sure sales tax is TEN PERCENT. And yea, everything is more expensive. But if you can tell me you can look out the window right now anywhere in New England and say you're happy with your surroundings, your a dirty lying bastard. And you know what I heard at least a dozen people say when I told them I was from CT? "Oh I used to live in _____, and I love it here, but I really miss the seasons". Those are the worst kind of people. You miss the seasons? Did you know that the ceiling in my family room is leaking because there are 27 inches of snow on the roof and we have buckets to catch the dripping water? Did you know that I can't leave my house today because there is too much snow on the driveway and even if I could I can't leave cuz these fucking buckets fill up every hour? Yea, the fucking novelty of 'seasons' has kinda worn off after 20 years in CT. Seasons my ASS.
2. The time difference. Seems kinda weird, right? Well for me, and people like me, sports play a significant role in my life. And I often find my evenings consumed by watching them. A Tuesday night in CT can start AND end with NBA basketball. But in LA, all sports start at 4pm on regular nights. And instead of having to wait until 3:00 on Sunday to watch the Bears v. Packers, I only had to wake up, eat, pregame, and watch the game at noon from a barstool. East Coast Sunday football starts at 1. LA football starts at 10am. You get the fucking point. So this helps impatient people like me function better. AND my sports, some would call it, problem, is more socially acceptable because I can watch all the games and still go out that night. Down side: if you work in the financial sector, like my wonderful cousin, you are on NYSE time...meaning work starts around 5:30 for you. Ow.
3. Lifestyle. More specifically, alcoholics. Ok that's extreme. But you probably thought I was gonna say Giada. Easy, killer. She's number 4. People are crazy in California. There's really no other way to describe it. Like if you've ever seen an episode of Weeds, that's not that far off of what's really goin on in LA. Everyone's from somewhere else and has gone out of their way to leave the old lifestyle behind and lead an alternative, Californian existence. That's fine. I just don't think I'm going to be friends with you if you say 'Brah' or 'God Bless, man, God Bless' all the time. We probs aren't gonna click. But there are normal people there. People that I like. And there's plenty to do. This was a typical weekday afternoon for me. Wake up whenever. Eat. Walk through the Palisades/Santa Monica. Run an errand. Beer by or before 2pm. Sushi/In N' Out burger. Beer. Basketball. Go out to some bar for drinks with people that have been doin the same thing you have all day. And that schedule was probably tame compared to what others do. Met a dude he says he was a former NY banker and now is a musician (sounds much more lucrative), gets drunk daily, and makes it a point to walk down to the ocean everyday. And while that's very damaging to your liver, it's also very California.
So as soon as my employer decides it's a good time to send Matthew out again, and I learn a little more scratch, it's up and move time. Anyone need a roommate? See you there.
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